This page covers couplers that are in use today by Sn2 modelers, and hopefully provides you with some guidance as to which one or ones you would like to use in your own models.
Sn2 modelers can use the Kadee #714, which is an HOn3 coupler.
Some are using the Kadee #705, also an HOn3 coupler.
Another suggestion has been to use the Kadee #153 short-shank HO-scale coupler. These are also available in a 25-pack economic package. Photos of their use can be found on the this Sn2Trains external web page.
Finally, another alternative are the HO-scale Sergent Engineering couplers. You can see photos of them being used on this Sn2Trains external web page.
As far as gearboxes are concerned, modelers have used Kadee 234, 242, 252, and 262.